Contemplating Life… or death?!

A train of thought shunted its way through my mind as I sat along the seawall at the worli sea front. I often sit there to watch the mesmerising sunset... an ending that is so beautiful ! I have no idea for how long I sat there enjoying the tranquility of that place & contemplating life ….. or death ?? In Mahabharata Yamraaj himself, disguised as the Yaksha, asked a few questions to Yudhishthira .. One of these Yakshaprashnas was , “What is the most wonderful thing about life?” To which Yudhishthira’s reply was, “Every day numerous living entities are dying and going to the abode of Yama. Yet one thinks/believes that one will live forever; will be immortal. What can be more wonderful than this?” We all know we are not immortal but usually most of us are so engrossed in our daily lives that we spend very little time thinking about our own mortality. It is often only after we lose someone, we have been really close to, that we take a moment and reflect on the fact that we too will some day die ourselves. Loss of a loved one often triggers this churning inside each one of us. We can’t help reflecting on what is real and permanent in this life?! We don’t know how much time is left for us on this earth. But once we honestly accept the fact that death is inevitable, before we have reached that time, we are able to set our priorities right. That reminds me of a beautiful poem by Mario De Andrade. He says… " I counted my years and discovered that I have less time to live going forward than I have lived until now. I have more past than future. I feel like the boy who received a bowl of candies. The first ones, he ate ungracious, but when he realized there were only a few left, he began to taste them intensely…..” Put your time and energies into what your hearts truly want or what gives you the greatest happiness. All sentient beings like us have a desire for happiness. We all are constantly on a quest for satisfaction. But invariably what happens is that we fail to identify those directions of true value and only when inevitable death approaches , life flashes before our eyes and our mind is then full of regrets. You remember many things you should have done and many, you shouldn’t have ! Australian author Bronnie Ware, In her book ‘The top five regrets of the dying, enlists such regrets which are very common with people. Bronnie is a nurse who worked for eight years in the palliative care department of a hospital. These patients had less than three months to live. Bronnie recorded their stories while she was tending to the needs of these dying patients and shared their thoughts about life in this book. She says, “All these people were different but their regrets were the same”. The common regrets, according to her, were… • l wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. • I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. • I wish I had the courage to express my feelings. • I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. • I wish I had let myself be happier

… the first one being the most common. What most of them missed was something their heart really wanted but which they ignored or put off for later, as they were busy doing ‘important’ things in life in the most ‘correct’ manner. Why don’t we just learn to identify the moments that we want to hold in our hearts forever, even as we go about our duties in life. We need to find our ikigai; our own ‘reason for being’ ! These are the things that make one's life worthwhile; add meaning to one’s life. Contentment and peace of mind is what we will look for when we arrive at the end. Make sure there’s a happy flashback. Live intensely. The word "Forever" was made for memories not for people. Create memories and cherish them. They are precious !! I will quote Mario De Andrade again… “My goal is to arrive to the end satisfied and in peace with my loved ones and my conscience. My soul is in a hurry… Not many candies in the bowl… ~•~

(Pardon me, please, if my thoughts seem to be a bit scattered.)

Aarti Manjarekar

16th December 2021